Can a man sue his wife for adultery?
Asked by: Darren Mayert | Last update: January 29, 2026Score: 4.2/5 (18 votes)
Generally, a husband cannot directly sue his wife just for cheating in most U.S. states, as divorces are usually "no-fault," but infidelity can influence asset division or alimony, and in a few states, a spouse can sue the lover for "Alienation of Affection," though this is rare and requires proving a happy marriage was destroyed by the third party. Some grounds for suing the spouse might exist for extreme cases like Infliction of Emotional Distress (IIED) or if financial harm occurred, but these are difficult to prove.
Can a husband sue his wife for adultery?
No, adultery is not currently a civil tort in California. In the past, there were adultery laws that allowed people to sue for infidelity. Many states also used to criminalize adultery. Today, however, unfaithfulness in a marriage is not a crime or legal tort in the State of California.
What's the difference between infidelity and adultery?
Infidelity is the broad term for breaking trust in any committed relationship (emotional or physical), while adultery is a specific type of infidelity involving sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than their spouse, often carrying legal or religious weight. In short, adultery is a subset of infidelity; all adultery is infidelity, but not all infidelity is adultery (e.g., emotional cheating in an unmarried couple).
Can I sue the man my wife cheated on me with?
Most jurisdictions do not allow suing a spouse solely for adultery but consider it during divorce settlements or custody decisions. Initiating divorce requires filing a petition citing appropriate grounds, which may include fault like adultery if applicable.
What are the consequences of adultery in marriage?
Mental health issues, such as depression or anxiety. Addiction, such as addiction to alcohol, sex, romance or drugs. Problems that aren't addressed in a marriage, such as fear of intimacy or avoiding conflict. Major life changes, such as becoming parents or children leaving home.
Can I Sue My Cheating Spouse's Lover During The Divorce? | Murphy Law Monday
In what states is adultery still a crime?
States Where Adultery Is a Crime. Adultery remains a crime in Alabama, Arizona, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Kansas, Michigan, Mississippi, Oklahoma, South Carolina, and Wisconsin. Below are a few examples.
What is the 80/20 rule in infidelity?
The 80/20 rule in the context of cheating suggests that people often cheat to find the missing 20% of fulfillment they feel their primary partner doesn't provide, while overlooking the 80% of needs that are met. This theory, adapted from the Pareto Principle, explains infidelity as a search for perceived deficits (excitement, validation, physical attributes) in someone new, often leading to the loss of the stable, satisfying 80% in the existing relationship, as seen in movies like Why Did I Get Married?.
What evidence is needed for adultery?
To prove adultery in court, you need strong circumstantial or direct evidence showing opportunity (circumstances allowing intimacy) and inclination (romantic or sexual interest), such as texts, photos, financial records for gifts/hotels, or witness testimony, proving sexual intercourse occurred, but you must gather evidence legally. Direct proof (like a sex tape) is rare, so combining evidence like phone records (calls, texts), hotel receipts, social media posts, or financial statements for gifts/trips is common, focusing on showing the spouse had the means and desire to have sex with someone else.
How much does it usually cost to sue?
Average lawsuit costs vary dramatically, from around $1,000-$5,000 for small claims to tens or even hundreds of thousands for complex civil cases, with median costs for typical matters like auto or employment disputes ranging from $43,000 to over $122,000, depending heavily on complexity, case type, attorney fees (often hourly or contingency), and expert witness involvement.
What rights do I have if my wife cheated on me?
Adultery can be used as grounds for divorce but complicates the proceedings. Infidelity can impact the property division if marital funds were involved in the affair. Alimony can be influenced by adultery in some instances. Child custody is affected by adultery when the affair directly impacts the child.
What are the three types of adultery?
1) The One-Night Stand, 2) Emotional Entanglement, 3) Sexual Compulsion and 4) Add-On Affair. Each affair type is quite different and they have a unique set of circumstances that surround them.
What is the big five of infidelity?
Previous literature has identified characteristics of the partner involved in infidelity; this study investigates the Big Five personality traits (openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism) of uninvolved partners.
What is a sexless marriage?
A sexless marriage is typically defined as one where couples have sex less than 10 times per year, and it can stem from deeper issues like communication breakdowns or health problems, often leading to emotional disconnect and avoidance of physical touch.
How hard is it to prove adultery in court?
Evidence of adultery requires far more than allegations of hurt feelings. You must go beyond feelings and come up with hard proof that your spouse cheated or had an affair. Evidence could include documentation of the affair, like a photo of your spouse and their sexual partner together, or an admission by your spouse.
Is a wife entitled to half if she cheated?
Generally, a wife who cheats still gets half of the marital assets in a divorce because most U.S. states are "no-fault," focusing on fair, not punitive, division based on financial factors, not morality; however, infidelity can affect outcomes if marital funds were spent on the affair or in fault-based states, though typically it doesn't change the 50/50 asset split.
What is emotional cheating in a marriage?
Emotional infidelity in marriage is forming a deep emotional bond with someone outside the relationship, sharing intimate thoughts, secrets, and support that should be reserved for a partner, often involving secrecy and deception, which undermines the primary relationship's trust and intimacy, even without physical contact. It happens when a spouse turns to an "outsider" for emotional needs, creating distance and betrayal, and can feel more devastating than physical affairs as it erodes the core emotional connection.
Who pays court fees in a lawsuit?
In the US, the rules can change depending on where you are and what kind of lawsuit it is. While each side usually pays its own legal fees (known as the American Rule), sometimes the court can make the person who loses pay some or all of the winner's lawyer fees and related costs.
Is it better to have an attorney or a lawyer?
Neither is inherently "better"; they describe different qualifications, with an attorney being a specific type of lawyer who is licensed to represent clients in court, while a lawyer is a broader term for someone with a law degree who can offer general advice but not necessarily practice in court. For courtroom representation, you need an attorney; for basic legal guidance or document prep, a lawyer suffices.
How much money is enough to sue?
You don't need a fixed amount of money to start a lawsuit, but costs vary widely, from under $100 for small claims court filing fees to tens or hundreds of thousands for complex cases with lawyers, with personal injury often using "no win, no fee" (contingency) arrangements where you pay a percentage (30-40%) if you win. Initial out-of-pocket expenses (filing fees, retainers) can range from under $100 to several thousand dollars, depending on court, case type, and lawyer.
Are text messages enough to prove adultery?
In family law, text messages are often used as evidence. They can show details about the relationship, communication patterns, or actions that are relevant to your case. Courts can consider text messages to support claims of infidelity, financial issues, or even child custody matters.
What is the biggest mistake in divorce?
The biggest mistake during a divorce often involves letting emotions drive decisions, leading to poor financial choices, using children as weapons, failing to plan for the future, or getting bogged down in petty fights that escalate costs and conflict, ultimately hurting all parties involved, especially the kids. Key errors include not getting legal/financial advice, fighting over small assets, exaggerating claims, and neglecting your own well-being.
What are the three stages of infidelity?
The three stages of an affair often involve an emotional build-up (infatuation/admiration), deepening intimacy (personal sharing/secret keeping), and finally, hiding or escalation (physical intimacy/commitment), moving from innocent contact to full-blown betrayal, though experts also describe recovery in stages like atonement, attunement, and attachment, or crisis, growth, and recommitment.
What is the #1 thing that destroys marriages?
While different sources highlight various factors, many experts point to breakdown in communication, leading to contempt, disrespect, and lack of commitment, as the most destructive forces in a marriage, often manifesting as emotional distance, frequent criticism, and a feeling of being unheard or unloved. These issues erode trust and intimacy over time, with infidelity and power imbalances being extreme examples of these underlying problems.
Can someone truly love you and still cheat?
Yes, it is possible for someone to love you and still cheat, as love alone doesn't guarantee loyalty or self-control; infidelity often stems from underlying issues like low self-esteem, past trauma, emotional insecurity, addiction, or poor coping mechanisms, leading to actions that contradict their loving feelings. Cheating is a complex behavior driven by internal factors, not necessarily a lack of love, though it's a profound breach of trust.
What is the 2 2 2 2 rule in marriage?
The 2-2-2 rule is a relationship guideline for couples to maintain connection by scheduling intentional time together: a date night every 2 weeks, a weekend away every 2 months, and a week-long vacation every 2 years, helping to prioritize the relationship amidst daily stresses and routines. It's a framework for regular quality time, communication, and fun, originating from a Reddit post and gaining traction for preventing couples from drifting apart by focusing on consistent connection.