How do you argue without losing your temper?

Asked by: Austin Sporer  |  Last update: August 9, 2023
Score: 4.5/5 (13 votes)

Read on to learn how.
  1. Slow down. Don't let your anger run away with you. ...
  2. Question your emotional reactions. When you react emotionally, the feelings are incredibly visceral. ...
  3. Think before you speak. ...
  4. Future-project. ...
  5. Consider potential domino effects. ...
  6. Empathize with your spouse. ...
  7. Learn to have better fights.

How do you control your temper in an argument?

Here are some ways you can express your anger during an argument and how to control it in general:
  1. Think before you speak. ...
  2. Is it worth arguing? ...
  3. Breathe. ...
  4. Walk away. ...
  5. Releasing the tension before-hand. ...
  6. Talk and write your feelings down. ...
  7. Apologize.

Why am I always quick to anger?

Additionally, anger can be a symptom of certain mental health conditions, including intermittent explosive disorder, bipolar disorder, and disruptive mood dysregulation disorder. You may also experience irritability or frustration if you live with depression or anxiety.

Why do I always get angry so easily?

While there are many reasons for anger to become a constant in your life, socioeconomic factors, chronic stressors, and underlying mental health conditions may all play a role.

What are the 3 basic ways of dealing with anger?

The three main approaches are expressing, suppressing, and calming. Expressing your angry feelings in an assertive—not aggressive—manner is the healthiest way to express anger. To do this, you have to learn how to make clear what your needs are, and how to get them met, without hurting others.

Techniques to NOT Lose Your Temper - Jocko Willink and Echo Charles

32 related questions found

How do you end an argument with one word?

But, as it turns out, there's one simple word which can put a stop to toxic arguments – and it's a pretty surprising one. Speaking to the Business Insider, Runkel revealed that we all need to start adding a simple 'ouch' to our vocabulary. He said: “[Try saying something like] 'Ouch. That one hurt.

Why raising your voice in an argument is not good?

But in an everyday argument, it makes it incredibly difficult to really process what the other person is saying in an objective way. In essence, you stop being able to hear each other or come up with appropriate responses, and the hurt that comes with the yelling sticks as a deeper, more significant memory.

Why do I go silent in arguments?

It's especially hard if you've learned to avoid conflict ever since you were young—and to stew instead. Or if you've learned that conflict is akin to aggression or violence. So we think by staying silent, we're easing our discomfort. And we're simply not used to confronting someone constructively.

What does a healthy argument sound like?

"There's no belittling, devaluing, name-calling, or insulting your partner," Dr. Greer says. "Both parties are able to listen, to problem-solve, to compromise. You can relate to your partner's needs and acknowledge that you want them to be happy." Compromise seems to be the most important aspect of all of this, Dr.

Is yelling in an argument ok?

People yelling at each other as a means of problem-solving comes down to poor communication. Sometimes people feel they must speak the loudest to get their point across. The truth is, yelling doesn't allow a partner to understand you better. It just forces them into submission out of fear.

What is the best line to end an argument?

"Let's agree to disagree."

This classic statement is a great way to end an argument. Dr. Berry calls this “a more direct version” of the previous statement, and Dr. Malek says that it can help reduce tension and allow both parties to feel like they've been heard.

Why do I shut down emotionally during arguments?

Shutting down emotions can be a normal part of human experience, as a coping strategy in stressful situations. Under high stress, it allows your body and brain to protect itself from perceived threats or harm.

How do you shut someone up in an argument?

Here are four simple statements you can use that will stop an argument 99 percent of the time.
  1. “Let me think about that.” This works in part because it buys time. ...
  2. “You may be right.” This works because it shows willingness to compromise. ...
  3. “I understand.” These are powerful words. ...
  4. “I'm sorry.”

What are 4 healthy ways to express anger?

10 Healthy Ways to Release Rage
  • Throw or break something (safely). via GIPHY. ...
  • Scream – in private. via GIPHY. ...
  • Sing it out. via GIPHY. ...
  • Dance it out. via GIPHY. ...
  • Do a tough workout. via GIPHY. ...
  • Journal. via GIPHY. ...
  • Draw or paint. via GIPHY. ...
  • Change your surroundings. via GIPHY.

What is the most common anger treatment?

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Treatment for Anger Disorders

One of the most common types of psychotherapy is cognitive behavioral therapy. The purpose of the treatment is to help an angry person recognize the self-defeating negative thoughts that lie behind anger flare-ups.

Why do I clam up in an argument?

You tend to clam up

This is actually a primal defense response, Klow says. (Think of a deer in headlights, applied to human emotions.) Reacting this way indicates that you have an innate fear of conflict, Dr. Durvasula says.

Why do I shut down when me and my partner argue?

Shutting down may be an automatic defense mechanism to protect oneself from further emotional distress. Trying to muscle your way through the emotional wave that hits you during conflict can prove to be ineffective, according to a study published in Practice Innovations.

What is stonewalling after an argument?

"Stonewalling is when, during an argument or disagreement, someone begins to shut down, withdraw from the conversation, and build a wall between themselves and the other person," explains trauma-informed psychotherapist Ludine Pierre, LPCC.

What do you say to always win an argument?

The 10 best ways to win an argument
  1. Call them names. Particularly those that start with A, B, C and F. ...
  2. Point out their deficits. ...
  3. Blame them for the argument. ...
  4. Gloat. ...
  5. Scream, yell, weep loudly, or go deadly silent. ...
  6. Use terms like always and never. ...
  7. Remind them you're right, they're wrong. ...
  8. Refuse to apologize.

What point should you make last in your argument?

Remember, your conclusion is your last chance to persuade your reader and leave a lasting impression. Restate your thesis, summarize your main points, make a memorable final statement, and, if applicable, discuss the broader implications of your argument.

What does yelling say about a person?

Yelling frequently occurs when an individual is excited, delighted, surprised, or in pain. Yelling may be inspired by a personal victory or loss. It may transpire when we are lacking in confidence, self-control, or certainty. We yell through a loud or abrasive screech, cry, warning, threat or as an expressive desire.

Is yelling a form of trauma?

You might feel bad if someone yells at you. Being yelled at is a very traumatic experience that can have long-term psychological effects. Your heart might start to beat faster, your blood pressure might go up, and stress hormones will be released. You will also have more difficulty thinking.