What happens if only one side wants a divorce?
Asked by: Prof. Orrin Haley PhD | Last update: January 30, 2026Score: 4.3/5 (72 votes)
If one person wants a divorce and the other doesn't, the divorce can still happen because most states are "no-fault," meaning consent isn't required, but the objecting spouse can make the process longer, costlier, and more contentious (contested), potentially leading to a default judgment if they refuse to participate, with a judge deciding issues like asset division.
What happens when only one spouse wants a divorce?
Oftentimes the court will grant permission to publish a summons, asking your spouse to come forward and respond. The summons must run for 28 days, and your spouse has 30 days from the final publication date to respond. If they do not, you can request a divorce by default.
What happens if one person wants to get divorced and the other doesn't?
Importantly, even if a respondent fails to respond, the divorce process can still proceed. In such cases, the petitioner may request a default hearing, during which they present their case to the judge.
What happens if only one person agrees to a divorce?
While the court will still follow California law, which means that the spouse requesting divorce can't just have anything and everything they want, the terms of the divorce will tend to favor of the filing spouse if the other spouse refuses to take part in the process.
What happens if one party refuses divorce?
If one person refuses to divorce, the process doesn't stop; the filing spouse can proceed, often resulting in a default judgment where a judge makes decisions on assets, custody, and support based on the filing spouse's requests and the law, effectively granting the divorce even without full cooperation, though it typically takes longer and costs more due to necessary court involvement and litigation.
What Happens If You Want A Divorce, But Your Spouse Doesn't? | Williams Law
What happens if one party refuses to get divorced?
Deemed Service
You will need to provide evidence to prove that your partner has received the divorce application, and the court will then decide whether your application can progress without their response.
What is the 10-10-10 rule for divorce?
The "10/10 Rule" in military divorce determines if a former spouse receives direct payments from the military pension, requiring at least 10 years of marriage that overlap with 10 years of the service member's creditable military service. If this rule is met, the Defense Finance and Accounting Service (DFAS) sends the court-ordered portion directly to the ex-spouse; if not, the service member pays the ex-spouse directly, though the court can still award a share of the pension. This rule affects how payments are made, not the eligibility for pension division itself, which is decided by state law.
What is the 2 2 2 2 rule in marriage?
The 2-2-2 rule is a relationship guideline for couples to maintain connection by scheduling intentional time together: a date night every 2 weeks, a weekend away every 2 months, and a week-long vacation every 2 years, helping to prioritize the relationship amidst daily stresses and routines. It's a framework for regular quality time, communication, and fun, originating from a Reddit post and gaining traction for preventing couples from drifting apart by focusing on consistent connection.
Who loses more financially in a divorce?
Statistically, women generally lose more financially in a divorce, experiencing sharper drops in household income, higher poverty risk, and increased struggles with housing and childcare, often due to historical gender pay gaps and taking on more childcare roles; however, the financially dependent spouse (often the lower-earning partner) bears the biggest burden, regardless of gender, facing challenges rebuilding independence after career breaks, while men also see a significant drop in living standards, but usually recover better.
Why is moving out the biggest mistake in a divorce?
Moving out during a divorce is often called a mistake because it can harm your financial standing (paying two households), weaken your position in child custody (appearing less involved), and complicate asset division by creating an "abandonment" perception, making courts favor the spouse who stayed, though it's not always a mistake, especially in cases of domestic violence where safety is paramount. Staying in the home, even in separate rooms, preserves the status quo, keeps you present for kids, and maintains your connection to the property until formal agreements are made.
What is the biggest mistake during a divorce?
The biggest mistake during a divorce often involves letting emotions drive decisions, leading to poor financial choices, using children as weapons, failing to plan for the future, or getting bogged down in petty fights that escalate costs and conflict, ultimately hurting all parties involved, especially the kids. Key errors include not getting legal/financial advice, fighting over small assets, exaggerating claims, and neglecting your own well-being.
What is the #1 thing that destroys marriages?
While different sources highlight various factors, many experts point to breakdown in communication, leading to contempt, disrespect, and lack of commitment, as the most destructive forces in a marriage, often manifesting as emotional distance, frequent criticism, and a feeling of being unheard or unloved. These issues erode trust and intimacy over time, with infidelity and power imbalances being extreme examples of these underlying problems.
What are the four behaviors that cause 90% of all divorces?
The four behaviors that predict divorce with over 90% certainty, known as the "Four Horsemen," are Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling, identified by relationship researcher John Gottman; these toxic communication patterns erode a marriage by destroying trust and connection, with contempt being the most damaging.
What are the three C's of divorce?
The "3 Cs of Divorce" generally refer to Communication, Cooperation, and Compromise, principles that help divorcing couples, especially those with children, navigate the process more smoothly by focusing on respectful dialogue, working together for shared goals (like children's welfare), and making concessions for equitable outcomes, reducing conflict and costs. Some variations substitute Custody or Civility for one of the Cs, emphasizing child-focused decisions or maintaining politeness.
Why stay in an unhappy marriage?
You feel a sense of obligation to your spouse and/or your family. You took your marital vows seriously and promised never to divorce, no matter what. Your spouse is dependent on you emotionally or physically. “I can't leave her when she is so depressed.” ”I can't abandon him with all his chronic health issues.”
Who initiates 90% of divorces?
Women initiate a significant majority of divorces, around 70%, with this figure rising to nearly 90% for college-educated women, according to studies like one from the American Sociological Association. This trend highlights women's greater dissatisfaction with marital dynamics, often stemming from taking on more emotional labor and feeling a lack of connection or fulfillment, leading them to be the ones to file for divorce, notes The Whitley Law Firm and Barnes & Diehl, P.C..
What assets are untouchable in divorce?
Assets generally not split in a divorce are separate property, including assets owned before marriage, inheritances, personal gifts, and certain personal injury settlements, provided they are kept separate from marital funds (not commingled). However, these can become divisible if mixed with marital assets (like putting inheritance into a joint account) or if marital funds are used to improve them, requiring careful documentation to maintain their protected status.
What not to do during separation?
When separated, you should not rush big decisions, badmouth your spouse (especially to kids or on social media), involve children in the conflict, move out of the family home without cause, make financial promises without legal advice, or let emotions dictate impulsive actions like excessive spending or dating too soon, focusing instead on maintaining civility and protecting finances and children.
What is the #1 cause of divorce?
The number one reason for divorce is consistently cited as lack of commitment, often leading to infidelity, growing apart, and frequent conflict/arguing, with financial problems, poor communication, and addiction also being major factors that erode the foundation of a marriage.
What is the 3 day rule in marriage?
The 3-day rule after an argument is a guideline designed to help couples work through an argument in the healthiest way possible. By giving your partner time and space to breathe, it's easier to resolve any underlying issues before they have the chance to blow up into something more.
Do most couples split bills 50/50?
Many couples split bills 50/50, especially if they are earning similar salaries. If your incomes are significantly different, however, a more equitable solution might be to split expenses proportionally according to each partner's income.
How to protect your assets in a second marriage?
One effective way to ensure your children and spouse are both protected is through a Qualified Terminable Interest Property (QTIP) trust. A QTIP trust allows income from the trust to go to your surviving spouse during their lifetime, with the remaining principal passing to your children after your spouse dies.
Does everything go 50/50 in a divorce?
A: In a divorce in California, the courts will divide everything in a fair and equitable manner. As far as community property goes, that effectively means everything is split 50-50.
Why wait 10 years to divorce?
Benefits of waiting until 10 years of marriage to divorce
If you're able to stick it out until at least 10 years of marriage, you're able to claim what's called spousal benefits, which will entitle you to 50% of your ex-spouse's Social Security claim, assuming that your ex-spouse is alive.
Can my wife get half my social security in a divorce?
Yes, an ex-wife can get up to half (50%) of her ex-husband's Social Security benefit if they were married for at least 10 years, she's unmarried and at least 62, and her own benefit is less than what she'd get from his record, with payments not affecting his or current spouse's benefits. She receives the higher of her own benefit or the spousal benefit, up to 50% of the ex's full retirement amount, and if he dies, she could get 100% (a survivor benefit).