What is relational aggression?
Asked by: Emmie Oberbrunner III | Last update: February 8, 2026Score: 4.5/5 (40 votes)
Relational aggression is a form of bullying that harms others by damaging their social standing and relationships, often subtly, through tactics like spreading rumors, social exclusion, giving the silent treatment, or manipulating friendships to damage reputations. It's a non-physical aggression focused on social manipulation to hurt someone emotionally, frequently seen in school settings, online, and in peer groups.
What is an example of relational aggression?
Relational aggression examples include: Spreading false rumors about another person to embarrass them or ruin their reputation. Making fun of another person for how they dress or what their interests are. Creating posts online to spread negative information about another person.
What does relational bullying mean?
Social bullying, sometimes referred to as relational bullying, involves hurting someone's reputation or relationships. Social bullying includes: Leaving someone out on purpose. Telling other children not to be friends with someone. Spreading rumors about someone.
Why do girls use relational aggression?
While some boys exhibit relational aggression, girls show the behavior far more often, Crick finds. The behavior appears to be motivated by the desire to maintain an exclusive friendship or relationship, she adds.
What are the causes of relational aggression?
Corroborating evidence suggests that relational aggression is associated directly with poor social–psychological adjustment in several developmental periods (e.g., asocial behavior, peer rejection, peer exclusion, loneliness, lack of prosocial behavior and delinquency; Crick et al., 2007; Crick et al., 2006a; Ellis, ...
What is Relational Aggression? | Dr. Gary Dumais | Select Human Resources
Who is more likely to commit relational aggression?
Relational aggression, or the purposeful intent to inflict harm on another through a social rela- tionship, has been identified as a form of aggression that is most often exhibited by females, yet researchers lack decisive evidence as to why.
What is the 5 5 5 rule in relationships?
The 5-5-5 method is simple, according to Clarke. When a disagreement comes up, each partner will take 5 minutes to speak while the other simply listens, and then they use the final five minutes to talk it through.
How to prove relational aggression?
Unfortunately, relational aggression is very hard to prove. Some children are so skilled at this type of bullying that no one would ever suspect them of hurting others. It is manipulative and sly. Keep screenshots of any online incidents and a diary of events as evidence.
What is relational aggression in a romantic relationship?
Relational aggression in romantic relationship refers to behaviors intended to hurt or harm one's romantic partner through the damage or manipulation of relationships, including direct and indirect aggression, as well as proactive and reactive aggression.
Which gender is more aggressive in relationships?
Beyond domestic abuse and physical violence, females have been found to emit greater levels of verbal, and indirect, aggression than males7,17.
At what age does relational aggression tend to start?
Males tend to be more comfortable engaging in physical bullying than females, who tend toward verbal bullying. Relational aggression may begin as early as preschool, and children are capable of utilizing social bullying by the age of five.
What are the 3 R's of aggressive behavior?
The "3 Rs" for dealing with aggressive behavior often refer to Recognize, Respond, and Resolve, focusing on calmly identifying cues, reacting appropriately (staying calm, assertive communication), and addressing underlying issues. Another common set, especially in education and safety, is Recognize, Respond, and Report, emphasizing awareness, appropriate action, and documentation/informing others. A different model, for managing personal anger, suggests Reflect, Reframe, and Refocus to control your own reactions.
What are the long term effects of relational aggression?
Several studies have found that both perpetrators and victims of relational aggression are more likely to experience internalizing behaviors (i.e., behavior problems that are directed inward), such as depression, loneliness, anxiety, somatic complaints, and social avoidance (Crick, 1996; Crick & Bigbee, 1998; Crick & ...
What is an example of relational trauma?
The most commonly recognized forms of childhood relational trauma are neglect of basic needs, physical abuse, and sexual abuse. These are devastating experiences for children. Emotional and verbal abuse can be equally devastating.
How to respond to relational aggression?
8 ways to stop relational aggression
- Make friendship cool. ...
- Explicitly teach kindness, compassion and empathy. ...
- Explicitly teach emotional intelligence. ...
- Teach kids to be: ...
- Carefully manage online activity. ...
- Create opportunities for children to meet lots of new people outside of school and get to know them well.
What are the 4 types of aggression?
The four common types of aggression often categorized are Hostile (impulsive, driven by anger to hurt), Instrumental (planned to achieve a goal, like bullying), Reactive (impulsive response to a perceived threat, like hitting back), and Relational (social manipulation, like spreading rumors), though sometimes they're grouped as Physical, Verbal, Relational, and Cyberbullying, or by function (e.g., expressive vs. instrumental).
What is the 3-3-3 rule in a relationship?
The "3-3-3 Rule" in relationships, popularized on TikTok, suggests evaluating a connection at three key checkpoints: after 3 dates (check for mutual attraction/vibe), after 3 weeks (assess consistency/effort), and after 3 months (determine long-term potential for commitment) to avoid rushing or getting stuck in a situationship. It's a framework to gain clarity on compatibility and decide if the relationship has serious potential, preventing wasted time and emotional attachment too early, according to this article.
Who is most likely to relational bully?
Although it can be used by both genders, relational aggression is more commonly associated with girls.
What is the 7 year friend rule?
The "7-year friend rule" is a popular idea, often linked to research by sociologist Gerald Mollenhorst, suggesting friendships lasting over seven years are likely to become lifelong bonds, while many others fade as people's lives and social circles change, with about half of your friends being replaced every seven years. This rule signifies that a friendship that endures major life changes, shared experiences, and evolving needs develops a deep foundation of trust and connection, making it more resilient to time and distance.
What are the signs of relational aggression?
Relationally aggressive behaviors include social exclusion, starting or spreading a rumor, giving a peer "the silent treatment," or threatening to stop being friends with someone if they don't act a certain way.
Which child is most likely to engage in relational aggression?
While studies examining relational aggression in preschoolers have indicated both genders engaged in this behavior, relational aggression is used more frequently by preschool girls than boys. Preschool girls engage in and experience more sophisticated, complex, and socially directed forms of peer relational aggression.
How to recognize passive aggressiveness?
Resistance to cooperation, procrastination and intentional mistakes in response to others' demands. Cynical, sullen or hostile attitude. Frequent complaints about feeling underappreciated or cheated.
What is the #1 predictor of divorce?
The biggest predictor of divorce, according to relationship research by Dr. John Gottman, is contempt, which involves treating your partner with disrespect, mockery, or superiority (eye-rolling, name-calling). Other key predictors, known as the "Four Horsemen," include criticism, defensiveness, and stonewalling (withdrawing), with contempt being the most destructive as it signals a complete lack of respect and invalidates the partner. Decreased emotional responsiveness and affection, especially in the early years, also significantly predict marital failure.
What is pocketing in a relationship?
In relationships, pocketing (also called stashing) means one partner deliberately hides the other from their friends, family, and social life, keeping the relationship private and out of sight, which can make the hidden partner feel unimportant, insecure, and confused. Signs include never meeting loved ones, avoiding social media posts, and making excuses to not be seen together publicly, essentially keeping the partner "in their pocket" without integrating them into their real life.
What stage do most couples break up?
Most couples break up during key transition points, often in the first few months (end of the honeymoon phase), between years 3 to 5 (the power struggle/decision point when reality sets in), and sometimes around years 7 or 15 as routine or stagnation occurs, though early breakups (months 3-5) due to incompatibility are also common as infatuation fades and real life hits.