What is the 7 year itch rule?

Asked by: Dr. Elmore Bernhard  |  Last update: July 15, 2025
Score: 4.6/5 (74 votes)

The seven-year itch is said to be the amount of time, on average, that relationships or marriages last but in actual fact, science suggests it may be more like 12 years. It's easy for relationships to become a little stagnant if we don't put the work in and make an effort to keep them fresh over the longer term.

Is the 7-year itch a real thing?

The seven-year mark is coincidental, says Kurdek. But it's not uncommon for problems to come to a head in a marriage after seven years, says Lonnie Barbach, Ph. D., a couples' therapist in Mill Valley, Calif.

Why do they call it the seven-year itch?

The seven-year itch or 7-year itch refers to the notion that divorce rates reach their height around the seven-year mark of commitment. While this concept has been widely disputed, it is a concern that plagues many if they start experiencing marital issues seven years into their relationship.

Why is the 7th year of marriage the hardest?

Around the seventh year, couples may face deeper issues like lost intimacy, complacency, or unresolved conflicts. Additionally, life changes like having children or career shifts can strain the relationship.

How do you get past the 7-year itch?

Consider the little ways that you can scratch the multi-year itch by reinvesting in your marriage:
  1. Be loud and proud about your commitment. Regularly express your love and commitment to your partner. ...
  2. Let your actions speak in addition to your words. ...
  3. Check in with your partner.

Is the 7 Year Itch Fact or Fiction? Overcoming relationship boredom.

33 related questions found

What year of marriage is divorce most common?

While there are countless divorce studies with conflicting statistics, the data points to two periods during a marriage when divorce rates are the highest: years 1 – 2 and years 5 – 8. Of those two high-risk periods, there are two years in particular that stand out as the most common years for divorce — years 7 and 8.

What are the signs of the seven year itch?

Signs and Symptoms of the 7 Year Itch
  • Decreased Emotional Intimacy. ...
  • Reduced Physical Connection. ...
  • Increased Conflict or Indifference. ...
  • Fantasizing About Life Without Your Partner. ...
  • Avoidance of Home or Partner. ...
  • Lack of Future Planning. ...
  • Feeling Stuck or Bored‍

What age do most marriages fail?

23. The average age for couples going through their first divorce is 30 years old. 24. 60 percent of all divorces involve individuals aged 25 to 39.

How long does the 7 year itch last?

The seven-year itch is said to be the amount of time, on average, that relationships or marriages last but in actual fact, science suggests it may be more like 12 years. It's easy for relationships to become a little stagnant if we don't put the work in and make an effort to keep them fresh over the longer term.

What is the roughest year of marriage?

The first year of marriage can feel like the hardest because it is full of changes and adjustments as you and your partner adapt to your new roles. Yet how you handle this period of adjustment is crucial to the longevity of your marriage, say researchers.

What is the hardest year in a relationship?

Years 5–8: Very Risky. Here are the reasons why this phase represents some of the hardest years of marriage: Small children need a lot of care and attention, and juggling between housekeeping and work becomes a very tough task, leading to differences and resentment.

What is the 7th age itch?

As skin ages, increased transepidermal water loss leads to dry skin (xerosis) and reduced barrier function. Dry skin is often itchy and prone to dermatitis.

How do you avoid the seven-year itch?

How to Prevent the 7 year Itch in Marriage
  • Address the problem and commit to doing something together. ...
  • Show appreciation and gratitude for your partner every day. ...
  • Keep things exciting. ...
  • Focus on intimacy. ...
  • Support each other.

What year do relationships get hard?

Still, there are common years when many couples face greater difficulty, because of unresolved conflict, exhaustion, diminished affection and intimacy, and unmet expectations. Some of these years include years 1, 5,7, and 10.

What is the science behind the 7 year itch?

The couples' marital satisfaction tended to drop off sharply over the first four years, then to stabilise for a while, and finally to begin another descent after seven years – that last result apparently supporting the folk notion of a 'seven-year itch'.

Are you considered married if you've been together for 7 years?

The myth that you're in a common law marriage if you live together for seven years is just that—a myth. None of the states that recognize these marriages have set a minimum amount of time that you and your partner must live together before your relationship qualifies.

Why do most marriages end after 7 years?

Of course, by the seven-year mark, partners are well past the honeymoon phase — and issues may have begun to arise. “With added time, marital struggles can include issues like poor communication and listening skills, a lack of empathy and partners having unrealistic expectations of one another,” Dr. Borland explains.

What is the 7-year itch STD?

Scabies is (if you hadn't guessed by now) an intensely itchy skin condition, transmitted by mites. It causes rashes, and can lead to significant secondary complications including bacterial infections and renal complications.

Is the 7-year itch marriage or relationship?

HOUSTON - The "7-year itch" represents the length of time it takes for some couples to experience a lack of desire and interest in their marriage. Although not exclusive to marriage, the 7-year itch is most often discussed with respect to married couples.

What is the walk away wife syndrome?

“Walkaway wife syndrome emerges whenever a wife who is emotionally detached and unhappy abruptly breaks off her marriage,” says Holly J. Moore of Moore Family Law Group. “It may seem abrupt to the [partner] but women generally think about divorce for several years before actually leaving.

What is grey marriage?

Gray marriages are defined differently by different people, but generally persons over fifty who remarry may be considered gray marriages. Others don't consider a marriage to be “gray” until a least one of the spouses is sixty or older. Here are my topmost concerns for “gray marriages”—marriages for people over fifty.

What percent of marriages are sexless?

According to research, many couples struggle with lack of sex in their marriages. Independent market research company Gitnux found that about 15% of marriages in the United States are sexless and about a third of divorces are caused by sexless marriages. But a relationship doesn't have to stay sexless.

Is the seven year itch in color?

Billy Wilder preferred shooting in black and white, but Marilyn Monroe's contract with Fox called for all of her movies to be shot in color. Monroe always thought that she looked far more attractive and glamorous in color than in black and white.

What does slower than a 7 year itch mean?

The titular phrase, which refers to waning interest in a monogamous relationship after seven years of marriage, has been used by psychologists. The Seven Year Itch. Theatrical release poster.

What is the seven year itch medically?

Scabies, also known as the seven year itch, is a dermatologic condition caused by infestation of the mite Sarcopetes scabiei var hominis. The female mite is located in the upper layers of the epidermis, just below the surface.