What not to say in child custody mediation?

Asked by: Mya West V  |  Last update: December 30, 2025
Score: 5/5 (9 votes)

Don't Use Possessive Language In Child-Related Matters While in custody mediation, try your best to consider the other parent in the parenting relationship. Avoid possessive statements when you refer to your child during the discussion, such as “my child” or “my kids.” It's incredibly hurtful to the other parent.

What to say in court to win child custody?

Good Words To Use In Custody Hearing
  • Your Child is Not Property. The primary thing you must remember is that your child is not property. ...
  • Best Interests of Child. With that in mind, you must always remember in Court, it is about your children. ...
  • Status Quo. ...
  • Child's Schedule. ...
  • Co-Parenting. ...
  • Flexibility. ...
  • Step-Up Plan. ...
  • Our Child.

What should you not say during mediation?

Disrespectful Comments

Making unnecessary comments under your breath, having a negative attitude, or rolling your eyes won't help you. The defense team might decide they don't want to meet you halfway to reach an agreement if you mistreat them. The mediator might not want to work with you, either.

What looks bad in family court?

Bad-mouthing your ex-spouse or engaging in verbal or physical altercations with them in front of a judge looks bad. If your children are present, it looks even worse. Judges understand that tempers run high during custody cases, but lack of self-control will not reflect favorably.

What is the biggest mistake in a custody battle?

The Most Common Mistakes Made in California Child Custody Cases. Failing to respond to a child custody case will not make the issue go away. Instead, it could lead to a default judgment. This means that whatever the other party is requesting will most likely be granted by the judge because you have not given any input.

Don't Make These Mediation Mistakes In Your Child Custody Case

33 related questions found

How a mother can lose a custody battle?

Serious neglect is proper grounds for a mother to lose custody. There is no "perfect parent" standard in the California Family Code. Family law judges understand parenting is an imperfect process.

Who wins most child custody cases?

Mothers historically have won more custody battles due to traditional roles and perceptions of mothers as the primary caregivers.

What is classed as an unfit mother in the UK?

Parental Unfitness: If a parent is struggling with issues like addiction or mental health issues or displays little interest or capability to provide sufficient care for the child, they may be classified as 'unfit. '

What should you avoid saying in court?

What NOT to Say while Testifying
  • Don't lie. This seems to be common sense, but it has to be said. ...
  • Don't guess. If you don't know the answer, say so. ...
  • Don't talk about your character. ...
  • Don't call other witnesses liars.

What is the definition of an unstable parent?

However, examples of instability can include a parent who has or is struggling with drugs/alcohol, chronic mental illness, or a physical condition that renders the parent unable to effectively care for a child.

What is the golden rule of mediation?

The Golden Rule of Mediation is to treat others as you would like to be treated during the negotiation process. It embodies the principles of fairness, respect, and collaboration, guiding parties to engage in negotiations in good faith and with a focus on achieving a mutually beneficial resolution.

What is not suitable for mediation?

Mediation will not be appropriate if there are issues of harm concerning your child, for example allegations of sexual or physical abuse, and/or you have experienced domestic violence, or if there is an imbalance of power within the relationship, for example, because you have a disability or because English is not your ...

What words do you use during mediation?

We then asked the mediators what words do you use to prime parties for the mediation process? The responses included 'efficient,' 'fair,' 'listen,' 'partner,' 'together,' 'trust,' 'appreciate,' 'willingness,' 'result,' 'path,' 'future' and 'please.

How do I impress a judge for child custody?

Child Custody - Impressing the Judge
  1. Be willing to work with the child's other parent. ...
  2. See your children whenever possible. ...
  3. Don't involve your children in the court case. ...
  4. Don't put the children in the middle. ...
  5. Perception is everything. ...
  6. Hire an experienced child custody lawyer.

What makes a strong custody case?

In California, evidence against the other parent showing sexual or physical abuse, neglect, addictions or other serious issues are necessary to pave your way toward getting primary or sole physical custody of your children.

What not to say in a custody battle?

Avoid cursing and putting down the other parent, your children, in-laws, and other family members, the mediator, the judge, and others involved in the process. That can be tricky when sensitive topics, such as substance abuse, are at play.

What should you never say to a judge?

Here are five things all defendants will want to avoid saying to a criminal judge:
  • 'I Did It. ' ...
  • 'They Didn't Tell Me...' ...
  • Expletives. ...
  • Lies, Lies, Lies. ...
  • 'I Will Represent Myself.

What do you say in court when you don't remember?

If you do not remember, say you don't remember – not that you do not know. Do not guess if you are not sure, unless you are instructed to give an estimate. If you make mistakes in answering, correct yourself as soon as you realize your mistake.

What words not to use in court?

The Bad Word List, also known as the anti-reptile word list, includes: always, never, must, required, every, any, safety, priority, prevent, and violate, among others. Each word eliminates judgment and circumstances and can trap witnesses.

What looks bad in a custody battle?

Don't abuse alcohol or drugs

Substance abuse is a major mark against a parent in a custody battle. When you're under the influence, you can't be the parent your child needs — especially if you're dependent on that substance to get through the day. Make responsible choices to show the court you're fit to parent.

How do you prove a parent is emotionally unstable?

How Do You Prove a Parent is Mentally Unstable?
  1. Medical records of the parent that say he/she has a mental illness (you may have had access to these records when you were together)
  2. Proof that the parent's mental issues have impacted and will impact the child's well-being and growth in future.

How do you prove narcissistic parental alienation?

How Do You Prove Parental Alienation is Occurring?
  1. Communication Records: ...
  2. Witness Statements: ...
  3. Visual Evidence: ...
  4. Professional Evaluations: ...
  5. Child Interviews: ...
  6. Social Media Evidence: ...
  7. Documentation of Denied Visitation: ...
  8. School and Medical Records:

How many fathers lose custody?

The True Facts About Child Custody for Men in The US:

Fathers are granted custody only 18.3% of the time. Mothers are awarded child support nearly 2 times as often as fathers are.

How to win custody as a mother?

Steps to How to Get Full Custody of a Child as a Mother.
  1. Gather Solid Evidence.
  2. Prove You Can Provide a Stable Environment.
  3. Keep Things Civil with the Other Parent.
  4. Get Help from an Experienced Family Lawyer.
  5. Focus on Your Child's Best Interests.
  6. Try Mediation.
  7. Negotiate Directly with the Other Parent.
  8. Create a Parenting Plan.

Who are the best witnesses for a child custody trial?

Picking good witnesses, like family, coaches, doctors, social workers, psychologists, counselors, or the kids' school personnel, can help a lot. They can tell the court about the kids' circumstances and what's in their best interest.