What to do as a mediator?

Asked by: Dr. Zita Paucek  |  Last update: February 4, 2025
Score: 4.7/5 (33 votes)

Mediation is a flexible dispute resolution process in which an impartial third party facilitates negotiations between parties to help them devise their own, mutually acceptable solutions. The mediator will ask questions, reframe issues, assist the parties to understand each other, and help identify solutions.

What are the duties of a mediator?

The role of the mediator is to remove obstacles in communication, assist in the identification of issues and the exploration of options and facilitate mutually acceptable agreements to resolve the dispute. However, the ultimate decision rests solely with the parties.

What are the 5 steps of mediation?

The five steps of mediation (and negotiation)
  • Preliminary stage. The first step in the process is the preliminary stage, during which you're deciding whether to mediate. ...
  • Preparation stage. ...
  • Information stage. ...
  • Negotiation stage. ...
  • Closing stage. ...
  • The takeaway.

What is the golden rule of mediation?

The Golden Rule of Mediation is to treat others as you would like to be treated during the negotiation process. It embodies the principles of fairness, respect, and collaboration, guiding parties to engage in negotiations in good faith and with a focus on achieving a mutually beneficial resolution.

What should you not say during mediation?

Disrespectful Comments

Making unnecessary comments under your breath, having a negative attitude, or rolling your eyes won't help you. The defense team might decide they don't want to meet you halfway to reach an agreement if you mistreat them. The mediator might not want to work with you, either.

What Does it Take to Be a Mediator? | #Mediation with Bob Bordone

22 related questions found

What is the hardest part of mediation?

The most difficult part of the mediation process is to get people to accept that mediation can be an effective way to resolve their dispute. Most disputes tend to be very personal and some people want their day in court, whatever the cost.

What words do you use during mediation?

We then asked the mediators what words do you use to prime parties for the mediation process? The responses included 'efficient,' 'fair,' 'listen,' 'partner,' 'together,' 'trust,' 'appreciate,' 'willingness,' 'result,' 'path,' 'future' and 'please.

What are the 3 C's of mediation?

Trust, communication and patience – which our neutrals consider the three pillars of mediation – are equally important to achieving a settlement in a guided and collaborative process like mediation.

How do I get the best results in mediation?

Five Keys to a Successful Mediation
  1. Attitude adjustment. This is probably the most important thing that you can do to help reach a successful conclusion in the mediation of your dispute. ...
  2. Prepare, prepare, prepare. ...
  3. State your case clearly and keep the emotion out. ...
  4. Be flexible. ...
  5. Be patient.

What to wear for divorce mediation?

Additionally, choose clothing with clean lines and tailored silhouettes to convey a polished and put-together appearance. Avoid overly casual attire, such as t-shirts, jeans, or athletic wear, as they may undermine the seriousness of the mediation process.

How to negotiate a settlement in mediation?

Learn about the facts and issues through the briefs and/or a joint session. Meet privately with the mediator at least twice to share your thoughts and find out what the other side is up to. Negotiate patiently. As long as both sides are moving, there may be a deal.

What are the 3 types of mediation?

Mediation is a process that can be conducted in three ways that vary in formality, goals, the mediator's techniques, and outcomes. Listed from more formal to less formal, the styles of mediation are: settlement conference, facilitative, and transformative.

How to start mediation?

The first step in starting mediation is for all parties to agree to the process. Mediation is a voluntary process, which means everyone involved must consent to participate. No one can be forced into mediation against their will. If you're the one proposing mediation, you'll need to present it as a beneficial option.

What can I do as a mediator?

Mediation is a flexible dispute resolution process in which an impartial third party facilitates negotiations between parties to help them devise their own, mutually acceptable solutions. The mediator will ask questions, reframe issues, assist the parties to understand each other, and help identify solutions.

How to break an impasse in mediation?

How To Overcome Impasse
  1. Take a break. ...
  2. Ask the Parties if they agree to set the issue aside temporarily and go on to something else - preferably an easier issue.
  3. Ask the Parties to explain their perspectives on why they appear to be at an impasse. ...
  4. Ask the Parties, "what would you like to do next?" and pause expectantly.

What are the limitations of a mediator?

A mediator is not a judge. They cannot sign paperwork to conclude a case like a judge. They also cannot make the parties agree to anything. It is true as well that most couples to a divorce end up with three lawyers: the mediator (who is usually a lawyer), a lawyer for the husband and a lawyer for the wife.

What questions do mediators ask?

Some Generic Questions (1)
  • What question, if answered, could make the greatest difference to the future?
  • What's important to you about the question? ...
  • What draws you to this issue, conflict or question?
  • What's our intention here? ...
  • What opportunities do you see in it?

What makes a bad mediator?

A mediator who cannot keep confidences is anathema to the mediation process and reflects a lack of integrity that is crucial to building trust and confidence. Any sign of partiality toward a litigant, his lawyer, or a legal position or policy can also damage the process.

What to say during mediation?

You are trying to persuade the other party and not the mediator, therefore speak directly to him or her. Describe particular behaviour rather than making generalizations. Avoid using words like “always” and “never.” Give concrete examples to illustrate your point of view.

What is the most difficult part of mediation?

One of the biggest and most common obstacles in mediation is when litigators refuse to budge from their courtroom arguments and conduct themselves as though they are presenting their case to a judge or jury. Mediation and litigation are different, and lawyers' roles in each are too.

What are the 4 pillars of mediation?

The four pillars of mediation – voluntariness, neutrality, confidentiality and party autonomy – make it stand out as a collaborative dispute resolution process. The first key pillar is neutrality, where the third-party facilitator is expected to remain unbiased in action and words.

What are mediation tactics?

The basic strategies are competition, avoidance, accommodation, negotiated compromise, and interest-based negotiation. Fourth, the mediator can help the parties to clarify the criteria that will guide their choice of strategies.

Do I talk during mediation?

You do not have to speak at mediation. Your lawyer – and the other party's lawyer – will be doing most of the speaking during mediation. Now, the mediatior may have questions for you, but the mediatior will likely only do so when he or she is meeting privately with you and your lawyer.

What is a good opening statement for mediation?

I'm (Mediator's Name) and this is (Mediator's Name). We will be serving as your Mediators. You may call us by our first names; how would you like us to address you? The purpose of our meeting is to help you work out an understanding acceptable to both of you to resolve the situation that has been developing for you.

What is a famous quote about mediation?

Mediation is conflict's way of looking at itself.” — Jeff Cohen. “Discourage litigation. Persuade your neighbors to compromise whenever you can.” — Abraham Lincoln. “Love your child more than you hate trying to communicate with the other parent.” — Unknown author.