When your child threatens to run away?
Asked by: Addie Stanton PhD | Last update: February 7, 2026Score: 4.1/5 (75 votes)
When a child threatens to run away, stay calm, listen to their reasons without judgment, and validate their feelings while setting boundaries, as it's often a cry for control or help, not a serious plan; for severe or repeated threats, seek immediate professional mental health evaluation to rule out serious risks like self-harm or dangerous situations, using resources like the National Runaway Safeline if needed.
Is it normal for kids to threaten to run away?
It's common for a child to threaten to run away from home. Often, those threats are unfounded and merely a cry for attention or help. That doesn't mean you shouldn't take them very seriously, though. If you suspect your child might run away, you can take steps to prevent the threat from becoming reality.
What to say when your child says they want to run away?
First, stay calm. Ungar suggests telling your kid that you'd really miss her and you don't want her to run away. “You're making them feel like they do have control and that you're hoping they make the choice to stay with the family,” he says. But don't roll over and give in to your kid's demands, says Ungar.
What are the behaviors of a controlling child?
What are the signs of a controlling child?
- Deliberately defying your requests
- Tantrums when things don't go their way
- Resistance to doing chores or household responsibilities
- Refusal to follow rules at school and in the community
- Being bossy with other children
What to do with a child that keeps running away?
If your child keeps running away, call the police to file a report immediately, contact the National Runaway Safeline (1-800-RUNAWAY) or NCMEC for support, and work on building trust at home through open communication and active listening to address underlying issues, possibly with family counseling to improve relationships and create a safer environment, said MissingKids.org.
What To Do When Your Teenage Daughter Keeps Running Away! & A Fathers Out Cry For Justice!!
What is the 3 3 3 rule for children?
The 3-3-3 rule for kids is a simple grounding technique to calm anxiety by engaging the senses: name 3 things you see, then 3 sounds you hear, and finally, move 3 parts of your body, helping to shift focus from anxious thoughts to the present moment and regain a sense of control. It's a quick, accessible tool for emotional regulation, great for test anxiety, big feelings, or stressful situations.
Can you call the cops on your kid for running away?
Yes, you should call the police immediately if your child runs away to file a missing child report, as law enforcement can enter them into national databases (NCIC) and begin a search, which is crucial for their safety, regardless of age, though search intensity might vary. Provide details like photos, clothing, and known locations, and also contact resources like the National Runaway Safeline for support.
What are the signs of a manipulative child?
Here are some signs that your teenager might be manipulating you to try to fulfill their needs.
- Ignoring parents and the rules they put in place.
- Giving parents the silent treatment.
- Gaslighting parents.
- Retaliating against parents' rules by being hurtful, mean, or disrespectful.
- Emotional blackmailing.
- Telling lies.
What is the 7 7 7 rule in parenting?
The 7-7-7 rule of parenting offers two main interpretations: a daily connection strategy and a developmental approach, both aiming to build strong bonds, with the daily version involving 7 minutes in the morning, 7 after school/work, and 7 before bed for focused attention, while the developmental rule suggests phases of playing (0-7), teaching (7-14), and guiding (14-21), emphasizing intentional presence and age-appropriate involvement to raise confident children.
How to tell if your child has behavioral problems?
You can tell if your child has behavioral problems by watching for persistent patterns of excessive anger, aggression (towards people/animals), defiance (arguing, not obeying), rule-breaking (lying, stealing, running away, skipping school), social withdrawal, extreme mood swings, and significant declines in school performance, especially when these behaviors are frequent, intense, and interfere with daily life beyond typical childhood tantrums.
What age is most common to runaway?
The most common age for running away is during the teenage years, specifically 15 to 17 years old, due to family conflict, abuse, or developmental changes, though many first-time runaways start younger, around 12-14, with females having a spike at 13 and males often starting earlier. While older teens are frequently reported, youth aged 12-18 make up the vast majority of runaways, with a significant portion fleeing abusive homes.
How to punish a child for running away?
If your child tries to run away again, you'll need to hand out a “take-charge” consequence. One take charge consequence is giving a fine. This could be losing extra time at the park.
What is the hardest age for a teenager?
There's no single "hardest" age, but many sources point to 14-16 years old as particularly challenging due to intense brain development (hormones & emotional brain developing before decision-making centers), peak risk-taking, heightened peer focus, significant identity formation, and increased parent-child conflict as teens seek independence while still needing guidance. Early teens (11-13) struggle with puberty's start, while older teens (17-19) face adult responsibilities like college or career, making each phase uniquely tough.
What is the most common cause of child runaway situations?
It's a symptom of deeper trauma, unmet needs, and systemic cracks that have gone unaddressed. A runaway child may be fleeing abuse or neglect, trying to escape family conflict, or searching for safety after living in poverty, unsafe environments, or communities filled with negative peer influence.
How to deal with an entitled adult child?
I highlight three proven strategies with my parent-coaching clients to manage their entitled adult children, along with real-world examples highlighting these action tactics.
- Set Clear Boundaries—and Stick to Them. ...
- Encourage Accountability, Not Dependency. ...
- Model Mutual Respect and Set Consequences.
Where to send out of control kids?
When a child is out of control, options range from local support like therapy/day treatment to residential programs like therapeutic boarding schools, wilderness therapy, or specialized treatment centers, often after an assessment by a professional to determine the underlying cause and needed level of care (e.g., <<a>PINS petitions</a>> for court involvement if home/community support fails). Start by consulting your pediatrician or a child psychologist for diagnosis and referrals to appropriate programs that fit your child's specific needs, such as mental health facilities or behavioral programs, potentially with insurance help.
What is the biggest mistake in custody battle?
The biggest mistake in a custody battle is losing sight of the child's best interests by letting anger, revenge, or adult conflicts drive decisions, which courts view negatively, but other major errors include badmouthing the other parent, failing to co-parent, poor communication, violating court orders, and excessive social media use, all damaging your case and your child's well-being.
What are the 3 C's of discipline?
The "3 Cs of Discipline" vary by context, but commonly refer to Clarity, Consistency, and Consequences for parenting/behavior, focusing on clear rules, steady enforcement, and logical outcomes. Other versions include Connection, Communication, and Capability for building skills, or Cooperation, Conflict Resolution, and Civic Values in educational settings.
What is the 80/20 rule in parenting?
The 80/20 rule in parenting, based on the Pareto Principle, suggests focusing efforts where they yield the most significant results, meaning 80% positive parenting (connection, quality time, teaching) drives 80% of good behavior and development, while only 20% needs intense discipline; it also applies to prioritizing self-care (20% time for you, 80% for family) for better results, and in custody, it's a child spending 80% of their time with one parent and 20% with the other, balancing stability with continued involvement.
What does a toxic child look like?
Toxic adult children thrive on drama. They gossip, exaggerate, pit family members against each other, and always position themselves as either the hero or the victim. They stir up conflict, then act like they're rescuing others from the “toxic” family members — usually the ones who are just trying to set boundaries.
What is a toxic daughter's behavior?
Toxic daughter behavior often involves a pattern of disrespect, manipulation, and entitlement, where she disregards boundaries, creates drama, offers constant criticism, and only reaches out when she needs something, draining family members emotionally while refusing accountability or reciprocating support, showing a selfish lack of empathy or consideration for others' feelings and needs.
What phrases do manipulators use?
12 Phrases Skilled Manipulators Use in Everyday Conversation
- “You're Overreacting.” “You're overreacting” works like a quick erase button. ...
- “I Never Said That.” ...
- “Everyone Thinks So.” ...
- “If You Loved Me, You Would.” ...
- “After All I've Done for You.” ...
- “You Owe Me.” ...
- “It's Just One Small Thing.” ...
- “Keep This Between Us.”
What should I do if my child threatens to run away?
Tell your child you'll miss her very much and add that you understand how angry your child must be to consider to leaving home. Then, try to talk about the problem with your child. Offer to go along; you're tired of the way things are too. A brisk walk down the block might just clear the air.
What is the 9 minute rule for children?
9 Minutes of Conversation
Depending on age, children need at least 9 total minutes of eye-to-eye “face time.” It may be 9 minutes straight, or a minute here and there. Babies need a lot of contact with their parents—look at them and talk with them often (it doesn't matter what you say).
What to do when you can't handle your child anymore?
When you can't handle your child anymore, prioritize your own well-being with self-care and support networks, talk to professionals like your GP or a therapist, and reach out to helplines or charities for immediate guidance; remember to seek help if you feel overwhelmed, as you don't have to cope alone. For practical strategies, try setting boundaries, taking breaks, and using positive communication, but focus first on finding someone to talk to and accessing professional support for yourself and your child.